A Hole Shaped Like You
by verysadtimes
Summary: It's always been there, that small voice in the back of his head saying that he should be occupying the number one spot. That it belonged to him. But the voice never mentioned the necessary sacrifices. (a.k.a. Todoroki finds out that a classroom without Yaoyorozu is his biggest nightmare – even if it fulfils one of his deepest desires...) [Semi-AU; TodoMomo]
1. It's Lonely At The Top

**AN: pssshhht it's not like I have ten thousand other ongoing stories, noooo, ahaha~**

***ehem* this story was born from two major factors:**

**a) the reverse situation of one of my other fics, The Girl from Shiketsu**

**b) the need to write emotional angst (I promise nobody dies in this one, and that there will be a happy ending)**

* * *

**I. It's Lonely At The Top**

_He watched as her fingers trailed over a few book spines, a pleasant smile dancing on her lips. "It's rare for you to ask me for help, Todoroki." She mused playfully._

_He glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes, feeling a bit nervous. He didn't actually need her help, to be honest. He just… wanted her to come along._

"_You're better at this kind of stuff. At least, I figured you would be." He replied, a bit too hastily._

_She quirked her brow ever so slightly. "Then I'm flattered you think so. What kind of interests does your sister have again?"_

"_She's a teacher." He let relief wash over him, the hurdle was overcome. "But she also enjoys cooking."_

_Yaoyorozu hummed in acknowledgement, walking across the aisle to another section of the book store. "Maybe something on western cooking?" She suggested, pointing to a book on display._

_Shouto looked at it for a few seconds, pondering. Was his sister really going to be happy with a cookbook?_

_He picked the book up and flipped through the pages. "Do you know any of these dishes?"_

"_Yes, our chef has prepared many of them before." She was standing a bit too close, looking over his shoulder to look at the recipes. Their hands brushed against each other when she suddenly stopped him from turning another page. "Oh, this one! It's really good, especially with roasted potatoes and parsley."_

_Practically leaning into him now, she flipped a few pages herself, ultimately taking the book out of his hands and skipping to the dessert section. She mumbled a few things, nodding approvingly every now and then._

_A few minutes later, she shut the book with a look of finality and held it out to him. "It gets my seal of approval." She smiled widely._

_In the span of a few seconds, Shouto hesitated. If he accepted this, then his excursion with her would be over. He didn't want it to be over yet. He liked… her company._

"_Co-Coffee?" He blurted out. "Do you want to get some coffee? Or tea? We still have some time, after all…"_

_She was still holding the cookbook out to him, looking slightly confused. "Um, sure, why not?"_

_Relief washed over him, he managed to overcome another hurdle. "Thank you, by the way." He mumbled quickly, taking the book and waving it. At least, he attempted to, but it was heavier than it looked, resulting in an awkward-looking gesture._

"_Don't worry about it. It's been quite a while since we've done anything together, hasn't it?" She laughed, leading the way to the cashier._

"_Y-Yeah…" He replied somewhat lamely. Everything he did and said today seemed a bit lame, to be completely honest._

_She began humming something, gently swaying her shoulders to the rhythm._

_He gulped, gathering his confidence. "Hey, Yaoyorozu?"_

"_Yes?" She glanced over her shoulder curiously, a sparkle in her dark eyes._

"_I… "_

* * *

His head was pounding, feeling like it was about to explode any moment now. It was also hot. As if he had been using his quirk for too long, throwing his body's temperature off in the process.

He wanted to turn, to move, to do something against the searing pain, but his limbs weren't listening to him.

Slowly, he tried opening his eyes. It took some time, but eventually he managed to peel his lids apart, blinking at the sudden onslaught of bright light.

There was a muffled beeping in the background, along with somebody saying something. As much as he tried, he couldn't make out the words.

His throat felt dry, making speaking harder than he'd like it to be.

"-ove too much." The voices slowly became clearer, a female one distinguishing itself from the others. "Shouto Todoroki? Can you hear me?"

He blinked a few more times, his vision focussing on the woman leaning over him. Somehow, he managed a nod.

"Can you speak?"

He tried saying something, but it came out as a cough. The woman gestured for him to stop, holding out a container with a straw for him.

"Drink something first, then think about what you remember. Your teacher has been notified and will be here any moment."

Did she mean Aizawa? Was he here as well? But he… Shouto's thoughts were muddled. What had happened? Why was he in the hospital to begin with? Whenever he tried recalling the past events, his thoughts came up blank.

"Doctor, Mr. Aizawa will be here in five." Another nurse poked her head through the door.

"Alright." The woman answered. "Just relax until then, Mr. Todoroki. I'll be right back."

When he was alone in the room again, he took the opportunity to look around, only moving his head minimally. It was a rather large room, plain, generic furniture completing the hospital aesthetic. How did he end up here? Was it a villain? An unfortunate training accident? Was anybody else hurt?

Somebody else… there was somebody else as well, wasn't there? But who was it?

His stomach growled, a sudden wave of hunger washing over him.

He'd talk to the doctor when she got back.

* * *

"Todoroki, are you feeling better?" His teacher took a seat next to the bed. "Do you remember anything?"

"Mr. Aizawa…" Todoroki rasped out. "What happened?"

"You really don't remember?"

He shook his head.

"Well, you spaced out and took one of Bakugou's punches to the face. You probably haven't looked in the mirror yet, but…" Aizawa made a few gestures around his eyes. "…let's just say your eyes match now."

That… would explain the sharp stinging pain he felt on his face. Was Bakugou the other person, then? No, that didn't seem right…

"The doctor mentioned you might be a bit confused, you did have quite the serious strong head trauma. Give it a few days, and it should get better." His teacher went on, ending it with a sigh. "I would really like to know what was so important that you didn't manage to dodge the most straight-forward attack in existence, so let me know if you happen to recall it, got it?"

Aizawa's voice was oddly threatening, with a hint of anger. Was Aizawa… angry at him? But why?

"Mr. Aizawa, is something wrong?" Shouto asked.

"What's wrong, is that my best student is in the hospital right now, and right before the sports festival, too. Just… make sure you get better in time, okay?"

Shouto watched his teacher leave, an uncomfortable pit of confusion forming in his stomach. Had Aizawa always been like that?

* * *

His next visitor was Iida, who, as class president, came to check on him and pass on the get-well-wishes from the rest of the class.

Somehow, Shouto doubted Bakugou was amongst those.

Something was wrong, though. Wasn't there supposed to be somebody with Iida? Somebody… else… Black hair…?

His thoughts were cut off by his headache, and he chose to ignore that random trail for now.

* * *

"Pathethic." His father spat. "Being hospitalized for something like that. It's unbecoming of the future Number One Hero."

Shouto didn't answer, just walked past him towards his room.

"We'll skip training tomorrow, but I expect you to be back on your feet afterwards!" Were the last things he heard before he closed his door.

The solitude of his room was familiar and calming, his personal safe haven. Still, there was a nagging thought at the back of his mins, as if he was forgetting something…

* * *

"You've changed." Jirou remarked, a hand on her chin and a thoughtful hum playing from her lips. "Maybe getting punched did you good, we should try it out on Kaminari next."

"Hey!" The boy in question exclaimed, faking hurt. "If anybody should try this out, it's Bakugou!"

"Shut up, you blonde twerp!" Bakugou barked in response to that.

"You're also a blonde twerp!" Kaminari fought back, pointing a finger at the blonde spikes upon Bakugou's head.

"Shut up!"

He shook his head, instinctively turning to the left, wanting to say something to the person next to him, but-

-the seat was empty.

Strange. He could've sworn…

* * *

"Momo Yaoyorozu." The name rolled off his tongue with practiced ease, filling in all the blank spots that have been popping up all over the place lately.

Class vice-president, fellow hero-in-training, his friend. The person who was with him when the… explosion occurred.

It was definitely an explosion, he was sure of it, there was no way he'd let Bakugou straight-up punch him.

But that brought up another issue. He glanced at the calendar. How had he been transported several months into the past?

* * *

He just couldn't wrap his head around this mess. Everything was the same. His classmates had the same mannerisms, leaving them nearly indistinguishable from the ones in his memories, the city infrastructure was identical, his family members behaved the same as usual.

But.

The seat next to his was empty.

It wasn't as if the Yaoyorozu family had disappeared suddenly, no, a quick Internet search revealed they existed in their financial blossom just as they were supposed to. But Momo Yaoyorozu was a phantom.

His classmates claimed to have never heard the name, and after a lot of contemplation and thought, he began to wonder if maybe he was the mad person here. What if she had just been a figment of his imagination? An ideal ghost created by his brain to get through the trauma that left him comatose?

What if she had never been real?

The thought made him shudder, because he could almost hear her laughter, see her reassuring smile, smell the bright aroma of her freshly brewed tea, taste the chocolate cookies she was so proud of, feel the comforting touch of her hand on his shoulder.

Was it even possible that all those sensations had been conjured up by his mind? The memories, too?

He shook his head. No, those were real. They had to be.

There was one last person left to ask. Aizawa. He'd been wary to mention his mismatched memories to his teacher up to now, especially since said man seemed pretty agitated, but this was his last chance. His Internet investigations had revealed that the Yaoyorozu family did have a daughter, but information on her was oddly scarce and vague.

Nodding to himself in determination, he approached the teacher's office, knocking firmly.

It took a while, but eventually his teacher slid the door open, tousled hair and a long yawn clueing him in on the fact that Mr. Aizawa had most probably been sleeping, or at least trying to do so.

"Todoroki." His teacher greeted him unenthusiastically. "What do you need?"

"I have a question. It won't take long, I promise."

Aizawa seemed to contemplate it for a few seconds, likely weighing the options of dealing with his student or going back to sleep back and forth, before reluctantly agreeing with a heavy sigh. "Ask away."

"Do you happen to know a student named Momo Yaoyorozu?" Shouto asked firmly.

His teacher's brows quirked in surprise. "Momo… Yaoyorozu? Are you acquainted with her?" There was something about Aizawa's tone, like scepticism mixed with caution. His eyes narrowed at Shouto, searching for some kind of reaction.

Bullseye. Aizawa clearly knew something. "You could say that."

"Shouldn't you already know in that case?" The whisper nearly escaped his hearing. His teacher continued mumbling to himself. "Or is it the head injury? Did you forget?"

Shouto chose to pretend he hadn't heard anything, patiently waiting for Aizawa to address him again. He had finally found a clue, he wasn't going to rush things now.

"She's in the hospital, recovering from her injuries." Aizawa explained after a few moments of thought.

"Injuries?" Were they from the explosion? No, that couldn't be, his own injuries weren't caused by an explosion either.

"The doctor did mention you might have memory issues, so maybe some of your more recent memories were affected." Aizawa concluded disgruntledly. "So, I guess it's possible you don't remember. Miss Yaoyorozu got caught up in a plane crash shortly before the school year started. She's been in the hospital since then."

...What? Plane crash?

He dug through his mind, vaguely recalling the various overseas vacations Yaoyorozu undertook with her family.

Overseas. Plane crash. Oh God.

"Which hospital?" He inquired urgently. It was fairly late but visiting hours shouldn't be over yet. He still had a bit of time.

"..." Aizawa seemed hesitant for some reason. His teacher grimaced. "Don't… expect too much. Musutafu General Hospital."

The first part of the statement flew over his head as he spun on his heel, ready to dash out of the school. "Thanks!" He added quickly.

"Oi! Don't run in the hallway!" His teacher's reprimand was distant when Shouto started running down the stairs.

* * *

True enough, the characters spelling out her name were printed on the nameplate outside of the door.

Visiting hours would come to a close soon, but the receptionist still was kind enough to direct him to her room. She was here. She was real. A wave of relief washed over him as he knocked on the door, knowing that she would probably be able to make sense of their predicament.

Once he thought over the facts, he concluded that she was just like him scattered into this strange world with unknown injuries.

But as soon as he entered the room, he realized he had misjudged the situation. The hope and relief were swept away in a thunderous wave when he met her eyes.

Eyes he had become so acquainted to were suddenly looking at him without the slightest trace of recognition, only confusion and curiosity.

Her brows furrowed. "Oh, I'm sorry… I thought you were somebody else. Did you get lost, perchance?"

It was her. It was definitely her. But at the same time, she felt like a stranger. Suddenly, he felt like he had invaded her privacy, like he had no right to be here.

He swallowed those emotions and closed the door behind him, only further increasing her confusion and wariness.

"Sorry for intruding. I should introduce myself, my name is…" He paused when something in her expression changed. Did she recognise him?

"You… Your uniform… are you from UA?" She asked slowly. "Wait, we've met before, haven't we?" She tilted her head in thought, grimacing as she filtered through her memories. "Right, at the entrance exams… for the recommendation students…"

It was almost painful to watch. "Shouto Todoroki. That's my name. I am from UA."

"Ah, right, it was Todoroki." An accomplished smile spread on her lips. "How can I help you, Todoroki?"

"I.." He didn't know what else to say. He had blindly assumed that she'd know what was going on, he wasn't prepared for this. "I wanted to inquire how your recovery was going."

Bitterness filled her smile, no matter how much she tried to hide it. Her lips grew into a tight line as she averted her gaze. "Did you come here to pity me? To say you're sorry, despite hardly knowing me? I didn't peg you to be that kind of person, Todoroki."

The unexpected drop of her voice caught him by surprise. "What?"

"If that's what you came here for, then you might as well leave again. Don't worry, I won't tell anybody you were here, unless you want me to." It was like an automated, robotic answer, simmering with silent anger and disappointment.

"What are you talking about? I would never…!" He cut himself off before he said too much. She didn't know him. They were strangers, he reminded himself. After taking a deep breath, he reconsidered his words. "I didn't come here for that."

"Did you come here to jeer at me, then? One less rival in the pursuit of heroism?" The volume of her voice decreased drastically as her fingers clenched around the fabric of her blanket.

"None of that!" He snapped angrily. What… what kind of image did she have of him?! Was this really what Yaoyorozu thought of him prior to their friendship?! "I just came here to…!" He calmed himself with a shaky breath. "... to make sure you were alright."

She eyed him sceptically. "I beg your pardon?"

In this world, they didn't know each other. Regardless, Shouto could tell she was essentially the same person, she had merely been wrung through an unplanned hardship. Below all that, she was still the highly-intelligent girl he knew. If he explained his situation, maybe… maybe she would believe him? And maybe even be able to help him?

"I came to see how you were doing." He repeated. "When do you think you'll be released?"

Her eyes fixated him in an incredulous stare, her mouth agape as if he had just offended her entire ancestry. Then she scoffed, and soon it bubbled into sardonic laughter. Something glittered in the corners of her eyes, highlighting the red rims under her eyes.

Too late, he realized he had fucked up. Badly. Really, _really_ badly.

She had been crying, how hadn't he seen the signs sooner?

"Released?" She spat out. "_When_ will I be released?! The question should be _if_ I even get released!"

Shouto's throat dried up as the realization of just how much he had fucked up began to seep into him. Tears spilled over Yaoyorozu's cheeks as a bitter smile stretched across her trembling lips.

"Please… just leave. If your fake concern is all you came here for, then… just… leave."

He didn't know how to respond. He didn't even know what to do. It was also only in that moment that he took note of the crutches leaning against the wall behind her bed.

There was no way he could do it. He couldn't ask her for advice. He couldn't tell her about the version of her that was on a secure course, snowballing towards heroism.

Not when the girl in front of him had lost all chances of fulfilling that dream.

* * *

His feet had brought him to a nearby park somehow. He didn't really remember walking over here, but he still slumped onto the first bench he found. His brain needed a moment to sort things out.

A nurse had seen him leaving Yaoyorozu's hospital room, apologizing briefly. It seemed that this was a common occurrence.

Shouto buried his face into his hands, inhaling sharply. This was wrong. Of all people, why Yaoyorozu? Why? More than anybody, _she_ deserved to be a hero.

He had never seen her so angry before. So upset. So heart-broken. So devastated.

How many people had she spoken to, all offering condolences on her lost dream?

How many had pitied her until she snapped? How many had laughed behind her back?

How many had given her false hope that everything would be okay again?

How many had told her it wasn't so bad, and that she was just blowing this out of proportion?

How many there may have been, he was just another one on that list.

His clenched fist tightened even further, his nails digging into his skin painfully.

What happened in that explosion?! Why was he suddenly trapped in this terrifying reality?! He never… he never wanted to make her cry…

He shook his head furiously.

It had to a fake, right?! This had to be some kind of quirk affecting him, right?! It had to be!

Because Yaoyorozu… Yaoyorozu had to be safe! She just had to be! He was sure of it, because Yaoyorozu was better… than him… at this kind of stuff…

… better… than him…

Suddenly, he recalled two distinct sentences the rang through his mind. Two sentences that had rubbed him the wrong way.

Aizawa calling him his best student when he awoke in the hospital.

Yaoyorozu asking him if he was happy that he'd have one rival less.

Nonononononononono. No. No way.

He gulped, his scratchy throat feeling drier than a desert.

Could this world… this reality… _have been born from his desire to be number one_?

* * *

[-]

* * *

"Thanks for letting me borrow your notes!"

She stopped drumming her pencil against the desk and took back her notebook from the boy sitting to her right. "Don't worry about it, Yoarashi." Momo smiled politely and put it back in her bag.

Her eyes flitted towards the clock. Five more minutes. Class would be over in five minutes, and then she could work on trying to solve the situation she's been caught up in.

While watching the second hand of the clock tick away at an impossibly slow pace, her mind ran over the facts she had gathered so far.

One, this world didn't match up with her memories. Everybody's behaviour was slightly off, and the gaping piece of evidence that was her current desk mate were proof enough of that.

Two, Todoroki was missing. He had been by her side when the explosion occurred, so where was he now? Was he trapped in a similar situation? Was all this a quirk-induced hallucination?

Three, nobody she had asked so far actually knew who Todoroki was. Did he… did he simply not exist in this world?

The bell finally rang, and Momo clenched her fist. She was going to get to the bottom of this.

* * *

_[-__"Because the hole in my heart  
looks just like you."__ -]_

* * *

**AN: ...how was it? Watcha think? ****well, do leave a review~**

**I don't think this one will be very long tbh, I've set my sights on five chapters for now...**


	2. Cast Aside

**II. Cast Aside**

Momo hardly ever used public transportation, but she did know how things worked. The rattle of the bus did little to break her concentration as she tried to make head and tails of her current situation. She had awoken in the hospital, the doctor claiming that she fell from a platform during training.

She scoffed at the memory, she wouldn't do anything as careless as that. Mr. Aizawa had visited her soon after, expressing the same confusion towards her injury. With her memories foggy, it taken a few days for her to fully recall what led up to all this. She distinctly remembered being at the book shop with Todoroki, then there was a bright light and… what happened afterwards was a blank in her mind. She could only conclude that somebody's quirk had put her into this state…

The bus rattled once more as it hit a bump in the road, causing her to sigh quietly. Sure, she could have asked a chauffeur to drive her to her destination, but she wasn't up to explaining why she was going there.

She went back to her thoughts, further evaluating her current dilemma. If this trip proved to be fruitful, then… She shook her head, she wasn't sure what it was supposed to mean.

The biggest surprise when she entered the classroom after being released form the hospital was no doubt the person sitting in the seat next to hers. It was Inasa Yoarashi, a student from Shiketsu High in her reality, but a full-fledged UA student here.

She didn't dislike him, his positive and jovial demeanour sure did liven up the classroom, too, but she couldn't help but feel like it was just… wrong. She didn't hold it against Yoarashi, not in any shape or form, it wasn't his fault after all, but… That place was Todoroki's.

Curling a strand of hair between her fingers, Momo's gaze swept over the countryside landscape zooming past the window, blurring into an array of greens and browns. Why did this place have to be located so far out of town? At least it wasn't at the other end of the country, she was grateful for that much. Her hand left her hair, reaching into her bag instead where she made sure she had the item she was going to need for this.

Convincing Mr. Aizawa had been easier than expected, but it didn't change the fact that the truth left an uncomfortable knot in her stomach. How could… How could this have happened?

She shook her head slightly. Focus, she needed to focus.

An automated voice announced the next stop, and she leaned against the window. This was going to take a while more…

* * *

"Visitor's permit?" The man at the reception desk asked dryly, not even bothering to look up from his magazine.

She slid the permit, along with her student ID, through the small available slot. The man finally looked up, and with a heavy sigh he cross-checked the information. "You're cleared. Head to room 316, the occupant will be granted permission to speak to you." The man slid a map along with her papers back towards her, promptly returning to his magazine.

She could only frown at his terrible manners. Regardless, it was not her place to comment on it, and she had more important things to do. Taking the map and her belongings, she made her way down the corridor, offering a polite nod to the guards she passed on the way. They didn't seem to take notice of her, and if they did, they chose not to show it.

The atmosphere the building held was… stale, at best. Depressing was a more accurate word to describe it. She climbed the stirs in complete silence, her steps echoing in the empty building. Ghostly would be another suitable term. Step for step, she came closer to room 316.

A guard was positioned outside, scrolling through his phone, probably while waiting for her.

"Excuse me?" Momo approached the guard, keeping her tone polite.

He seemed startled at first. "Ah, the visitor, yes?" he paused, furrowing his brows. "Although I am a bit concerned as to why a young lady is visiting a place like this… are you a relative? He hardly gets any visitors…"

_I'm his friend_, is what she wanted to answer, but she pulled herself together and gave the official reason. "I'm doing some research for a school project. I thought it'd be beneficial to speak to somebody my age for this…"

"I'm not really sure I understand, but I hope this helps your studies, young lady." The guard chuckled, unlocking the door for her. "I'll check in on you every twenty minutes, but you'll be granted privacy until then. You are free to leave anytime."

"Thank you." She walked past him into the dimly lit room. A chair was positioned in front of a glass wall, along with a small table. And behind the glass was…

Todoroki.

But was it the Todoroki she knew? She couldn't be sure yet, so she pulled out the chair, making enough noise to alert him that somebody had entered the room. He looked up in surprise, his messy bangs framing suspicious eyes. The person in front of her was a far cry from the usually neat boy she knew, much to her dismay. He was looking at her like a scared animal would, apprehensively looking for a way to run away.

She put on the best smile she could muster, biting back the tears that threatened to come. It hurt to see him like this. "Hello, my name is Momo Yaoyorozu." She introduced herself.

"…You came to visit me, I'm sure you already know my name." Todoroki responded after a few minutes of silence.

"Won't you introduce yourself to me anyway?" The smile on her lips was hard to keep up. Especially when he was looking at her like that. "It's basic courtesy."

He didn't trust her. His eyes said it loud and clear. He didn't trust her… She pulled herself together, she had prepared herself for this mentally. But there was only so much that preparation could do.

"… I'm the inmate of room 316. Shouto Todoroki."

The word "inmate" sounded so harsh, but she couldn't even begin to imagine what things must be like here. At least the receptionist chose to use the formal word "occupant".

"…what does some random girl want from me?" He asked gruffly, eyes narrowing further at her. "…did my family send you?"

Momo had considered asking his family, but she wasn't sure how to explain that she knew him… after all, in this world, he had spent the past five years in a mental correctional facility.

Being called a random girl on the other hand kind of stung, but once again, she did her best to dismiss the emotion. "No, I merely wanted to talk to you."

"Talk to me? Why?" He sounded so incredulous, as if the idea itself was like saying that pigs grew on trees. "Nobody… "

She did come here with the small hope that he'd recognize her, and they could work on getting out of this together, but with that possibility falling flat, she had to resort to plan B. Figure out what happened. Somehow. She wasn't entirely sure of _how_ she was going to accomplish this, but she knew she'd find a way.

"Todoroki…" He perked up at the sound of his name. "…what do you think about heroes?"

"Heroes…?" His eyes swept downwards, then back to her face. "…that uniform… is like… father's old one. You're from UA?"

He didn't look happy about it. Maybe she should have changed into a different outfit…? On the other hand, she wasn't sure if they'd accept her student ID if she was in casual wear, and officially she _was_ here on school business. "I am. But don't think too much of it. I do not have any affiliations with your father."

"Heroes…" Todoroki looked to the side. "I wanted to be a hero when I was younger."

She had expected him to be a lot angrier about the topic, even prepared herself emotionally to be screamed at, but the defeat in his voice was… honestly, it was a lot worse. It hurt.

"But that's out of the question now." He went on, closing his eyes briefly. "I'm stuck here until the foreseeable future. I still don't know how this interests you in any way, …what was your name again?"

"Yaoyorozu."

"…Yaoyorozu." He said flatly. "I'm sure you have more worthwhile things to do than hang out in a dump like this."

"I don't see what the problem is." The smile she mustered this time was filled with sadness. "I'm merely talking to somebody who's my age, somebody who…" She chose not to finish that sentence, not yet at least.

"You're attending one of the most prestigious schools in the country." He pointed out flatly. "Are you telling me there are no people your age there?"

She laughed a bit at that. "There are, there are. But…" This would probably be a sore topic for him, but she had to take the risk. Stringing together the words in the best way she could, she cleared her throat. "Don't you think you'd have attended UA as well, if the circumstances were different? Who knows, we might have even been classmates… I was curious."

He flinched visibly. "I don't think about useless dreams and possibilities."

She couldn't say that she understood, but she could imagine the painful thought of never being able to become a hero. She fiddled with the hem of her skirt, then quickly clenched her fingers into determined fists. "Todoroki." She said firmly.

"What?"

"Will you be my friend?" She made sure to look him in the eyes, hoping he would understand how serious she was about this.

He stared at her, his expression morphing between different emotions. "…_what_?"

"Can we be friends?" She asked again.

"Do you even know why I'm here?" He leaned forward, coming closer to the glass, a grimace on his face. A palm pressed against the clear surface as he glowered at her. "Do you really want to be _friends_ with somebody like _me_?"

"I'm sure…" _I know…_ "…you are a kind person, deep down."

Todoroki backed away from the glass, putting distance between them. "Do as you will. Don't say I didn't warn you." A pause. "I think we're done here."

She couldn't force him to do anything he didn't want to, and he was starting to look uncomfortable. She could only take what she could get. "Thank you for talking to me. I'm sure I will be back soon."

He didn't answer anymore. With a soft sigh, she exited the room.

* * *

"Good evening, until the next time we meet." She bowed her head slightly to the guard.

"Wait, you're coming back?" He asked, confused. "This really isn't the best place to spend your free time. Youth is short-lived, you know?"

She merely smiled in response. Todoroki was her friend, whether he knew it or not.

* * *

"Where'd you rush off to after school yesterday?" Jirou inquired between mouthfuls of food. "You were super nervous about it. Something family-related?"

"Ah, no, it was… a personal errand." She explained vaguely. Jirou didn't know who Todoroki was, after all. And if she did, it was only because she'd heard the false rumours regarding him and what he supposedly did.

"Personal errand? _Now_ I'm really interested!" Ashido joined the conversation, flopping down onto a nearby chair. "Tell us, tell us!"

"It's really nothing that would concern you." Momo waved it off. "More importantly, about today's math lesson, …"

"Math?! How is math more important than your personal life?!" Ashido pushed out her bottom lip into a pout. "Yaomomoooo, your priorities are all wrong. We're young, we gotta have fun! It's the perfect age for friendship and romance to blossom!"

"…Romance?" Momo muttered hesitantly. "I think we're all a bit too young for that…"

"No! We're at the perfect age!" Ashido pumped a fist into the air. "Highschool sweethearts, blossoming, brief romances, the couple that will never confess to each other until ten years later, it all happens during your high school years!"

This conversation seemed familiar, she was sure she'd heard it before. Sometimes, she wished she could be as energetic as Ashido. As optimistic, as well. But… Now was not the time for that. There were more pressing matters at hand.

"Oi, Miss Number One Student." Jirou waved a hand in front of her face, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"Oh sor- wait, what did you just call me?"

"Huh? Miss Number One Student?" Jirou seemed confused. "What's wrong with it? You're our class' top student, remember?"

"No, I'm n-" She cut herself off. Wait, did that still apply in this reality? Todoroki wasn't here, Yoarashi was terrible at academics… She glanced over at Bakugou and Midoriya, what about them? Did she truly surpass them here?

"Yaomomo, are feeling okay? You seem a bit out of it…"

She shook her head quickly. "I'm fine."

* * *

It was true.

She closed the copy of the school magazine with a sigh. How did it come to this? Was it because of her strive to be the best? Was she trapped in some sort of psyche-based illusion?

How was she supposed to break out of it? Renounce the number one position?

Another thought nagged at her, whispering treacherous speculations. _Did she, deep down, see Todoroki as an obstacle?_

Was that the real reason things came to this? No, she shook her head. Surely not. She wasn't… _envious_ of him. Or… was she?

* * *

[-]

* * *

He needed to talk to her. Say… something. Shouto knew she probably wouldn't take well to him apologizing, but it was the only possibility that his mind could come up with. He groaned in defeat, rubbing his forehead.

He had to fix this, somehow. Even though he knew this wasn't part of his reality, he couldn't stand the thought of it, the sight of her stuck in a position like this. It was just… wrong. There was no other word to describe it, and if his selfish desires led to this, it was his responsibility to take care of it.

"How did it go?"

Shouto looked up at the source of the voice, frowning when he saw Mr. Aizawa leaning against the window next to the empty seat. A quick glance in the other direction told him the others had already left the classroom for their lunch break.

"About as well as you can imagine." He answered hesitantly.

"I told you not to expect too much." Aizawa sighed. "I went to talk to her about her admission to UA, which will probably be forcibly removed soon. Somebody with limited mobility will prove to be a liability at some point."

His teacher's words were harsh, but not without truth. Even with support items, even with her quirk, it was going to be difficult for her to become a hero.

"Couldn't Recovery Girl do anything?" Shouto inquired. "I'm sure tha-"

"Too much time had passed by then." Aizawa frowned. "I shouldn't be telling you this, but… all the passengers on that plane would be dead if Yaoyorozu hadn't been there. She used her quirk without authorization to create lifeboats and other necessities for everyone and exhausted herself to the point her own body couldn't keep up with any attempts at self-recovery. By the time external forces finally found them, and the whole quirk part was covered up from the media, by the time Recovery Girl was called in…" He shook his head. "I trust you to keep quiet about this."

"…why did you tell me all this?"

"I didn't tell you anything, remember?" Aizawa turned away. "But… I'm not sure. Teacher's instinct, I guess."

* * *

Shouto ran his fingers across the cover of the book, tracing each character carefully. He remembered when Yaoyorozu had seen it in his bookshelf, fervently asking him to loan it to her because she had been looking for that particular book for some time.

They were supposed to work on a school project together, but that day mostly consisted of her raiding his bookshelves. The memory brought a small smile to his face. He'd make sure he could return to that reality.

The elevator dinged, alerting his arrival on the fourth floor. He put the book back into his bag and made his way to her hospital room.

_Momo Yaoyorozu._

He took a deep breath. His fist hovered over the door, and just as he was about to knock, somebody tapped his shoulder. It was the nurse from the other day.

"I'm surprised you came back." She smiled gratefully. "Most people don't."

"I… came to give her something. As an apology for what I said." He wasn't sure why he was telling the nurse this, but it seemed to appease her.

"Thank you. I can tell you are a very kind person. Please be patient with her… she… she's having a hard time accepting this."

Shouto nodded numbly. Readying himself once more, he knocked.

Yaoyorozu openly glared at him when he entered. "You again? Are you here to ask me more unnecessary questions?"

He shook his head. "My words probably don't mean much to you, but I am sorry." He placed the book on the table next to her bed. "I think… you'll enjoy this one. I'll take my leave now."

With that, he turned around, ready to leave again.

"Wait. Why…" He glanced over his shoulder at her when she called out. She looked troubled. "Why are you doing this? How did you even find this book?"

He could tell she was trying not to reach for the book. That she was curious, maybe even a little bit excited. It was small little things like this that reassured him that there was still hope. If he could get her to speak to him normally, then…

It still felt wrong to ask her for advice, but maybe she could help him regardless.

"I said some insensitive things the other day. I'm sorry." But today wasn't the day for deeper conversations. He'd come back another time for that.

* * *

"Are you excited for the sports festival, Todoroki?" Midoriya asked over lunch. Iida and Uraraka were at the table with them.

Excited was probably the wrong word. "I guess." He answered anyway.

"I must admit, ever since Bakugou punched you, you have been a more sensible person." Iida said. It was almost as if they all liked to rub in the part where Bakugou punched him.

"Is that so?" He feigned ignorance. It wasn't like he could say that he was basically a different person at this point in time.

"Yep, it's true." Uraraka quipped in. "You're a lot nicer now, too!"

"I see. Thank you." Having this conversation felt awkward. He wasn't sure what to say without being _too_ different from back then.

* * *

It felt so wrong. His father was gleefully laughing on the side-lines while he received the first place medal from All Might.

This world hadn't just affected Yaoyorozu. Bakugou and Midoriya too…

This… this is not what he wanted.

He didn't deserve this medal.

* * *

When he came home, a familiar scent greeted him.

"Ah Shouto, come, come, sit down!" His sister called him excitedly. "I made your favourite!"

She looked so happy, so _proud_ of him. He entered the dining room, seeing that the table had already been set. Fuyumi grabbed him by his shoulders and steered him towards his seat, the wide smile on her face never fading.

"You did so well." She said gently. "Congratulations."

He could barely muster a thanks as she rushed back into the kitchen.

He loved her cooking. More than anything, he loved her soba. But… somehow… he had lost all his appetite.

He had strived for first place so badly all the time, but now that he actually could hold it in his hands, all he wanted to do was throw it away as possible.

* * *

"I believe congratulations are in order." Yaoyorozu said quietly. Her hands were clasped in her lap, resting on the book he had brought by the other day.

"Thank you." He muttered quickly.

Back then, Yaoyorozu had congratulated him as well, but it had held more meaning. She was part of the team that helped him to victory back then. This time, she was merely an observer.

"…did you like the book?"

"I have to admit, it's suspicious that you would know what kind of books I read." She finally looked over to where he was standing. At least she seemed calmer. That was good.

But he didn't have an answer to that. He could hardly tell her that he knew her and her preferences. "You… seemed like that kind of person."

"You're surprisingly sharp if you could deduce that from two meetings, one at which we didn't even talk to each other." She frowned. "First you ask about my well—being, then you bring a book. Why? What are your reasons for being kind to me?"

He wasn't sure himself, to be honest. _This_ Yaoyorozu was a stranger, after all. He could have very well left her here and try to find a way back without ever talking to her again. However, if this really was his fault… if this reality was his doing… he had to do something.

"It's not as if our families are connected, or as if you owe me anything. I don't understand." She went on when he didn't respond. "Do you… perhaps… want me to do something for you?"

Todoroki was a terrible liar, especially when it came to lying to her. Remaining silent would be best for now, changing the topic too abruptly wouldn't help either.

"I'm right, aren't I?" She sounded… sad. Disappointed. "Well, I'm afraid I'm not of much use anymore, so maybe you should ask someb-"

"That's not true." He interrupted her. "You're not useless. You never will be."

"…what?"

"Excuse me, I have to leave now." He cut their session short, leaving as abruptly as he came. He had to watch his words, if he said too much he might not be able to fix it again. He had reached a point where she would talk to him normally, and he was determined to keep it that way.

He glanced back as he closed the door behind him, catching one last look at her surprised expression.

* * *

[-]

* * *

Momo stood under a nearby shelter as she waited for the next bus. The hard drumming of raindrops meeting plastic echoed around her.

She sighed, slowly clutching the fabric of her shirt. Envy? Jealousy?

They were friends, she shouldn't have such despicable feeling towards him. They had to support each other, no matter what. No matter what…

The bus pulled up in front her, but she didn't get in.

* * *

[-"These hands could hold the world  
but it will never be enough."-]

* * *

**AN: Heyoo~ I hope this chapter clears up some stuff xD**

**as always, I'd love to hear your thoughts :))**


	3. All Or Nothing

**III. All Or Nothing**

She didn't go the next day either. The guilt slowly building up in her heart urged her to change that as soon as possible, but Momo just couldn't shake off the ugly feeling of self-doubt. How was it possible that in a world where she stood at the top, everything was just so... _wrong_? There were so many talented students in her class, so why? How had all of them been reduced to something below her own level, for nothing more than a selfish, self-indulgent desire that she could live without easily?

She shook her head, this was not something she should be thinking about during maths. The answer sheet in front of her was filled out already, her neat handwriting filling the blank spaces. They still had some time left, but she was used to finishing earlier. A sudden urge came across her fingers.

Slowly, hesitantly, she picked up the eraser, hovering over a question that she had most definitely answered correctly. One deep breath later, she dragged the eraser across the penciled numbers, quickly scribbling something else in its position.

What would change if she handed in a paper full of wrong answers? She would definitely lose the top spot, wouldn't she? Was that the solution?

But what if it wasn't? What if the way to break it was to maintain the top spot? Was she willing to take the risk?

She quickly came to the conclusion that yes, she was willing to risk it. The eraser was put to paper again, removing the truthful answers with desperation.

* * *

"I'm not sure what I'm looking at." Mr. Ectoplasm held up her answer sheet, frowning at the red markings littering the page. "Are you not feeling well today? You usually would never allow yourself to make mistakes such as these…"

"I have been feeling a bit under the weather lately… I'm not sure why though…" Momo put a hand to her chest and sighed theatrically. "But please do not worry about me, I will accept this grade and learn from my mistakes."

Her maths teacher furrowed his brows, at least that's what she assumed his expression was meant to convey. "It will put a dent in your perfect record, Yaoyorozu."

"I know." That was the plan, after all. Dent it, crack it, break it. Crumple it up and throw it away. If that's what it took to save him, she'd do it in a heartbeat.

Mr. Ectoplasm seemed hesitant. "I can make an exception and let you retake the test, you know?"

Momo shook her head with determination. "Please don't treat me any different than my classmates."

* * *

Momo had holed herself up in the library in the hopes of getting struck by a good idea. The familiar scent of paper and worn books helped ease her mind, but at the same time there was a certain restlessness deep within her soul.

What was she supposed to do? And even if she went to visit this world's Todoroki again, what would she tell him?

She sighed in frustration, pressing her fingertips into her temples as if it would stimulate her brain power. But she got nothing. Nada.

"Stupid, stupid." She muttered to herself, letting her head sink through her hands until her shoulders slumped and her forehead met the surface of the table with a soft thud. "Why was I so stupid?"

How would _she_ feel if some over-privileged stranger waltzed into her life and declared they wanted to be friends? How would _she_ feel if said stranger suddenly started spouting nonsense about being from an alternate timeline where circumstances are nice and rosy?

Clearly, she would be suspicious and apprehensive. Just as Todoroki was.

But she needed to do something, didn't she? She had to find a way to fix this. She _had_ to.

Because, because…

Finding a logical, rational answer was harder than expected, but it just felt like it was wrong. Her _heart_ was telling her it was wrong.

But her heart didn't have a solution either.

* * *

It took her a week to finally get on the bus and visit him again.

Seven days of walking to the bus stop and giving in to her own cowardice. Seven days of wrecking her brain over how to fix this. Seven days of making weak excuses for herself.

Seven days of brainstorming with no results.

But at the end of those seven days, she was sitting across of him in the same dimly lit, uninviting room. "Good afternoon."

He didn't answer.

It was unlike her to storm into a fight without a battle plan, but she just… couldn't do it.

She couldn't see this as a bonafide battle.

Her eyes drifted to his unkempt appearance, that nagging, accusatorial voice whispering at the back of her mind. _That it was all her fault._

"How was your day?" She asked hastily, in a sad attempt to drown out the voice.

"...I woke up and ate my meals. You can leave now."

While the short and concise answer was true to Todoroki's character, it wasn't what she had been hoping to hear. She knew it was a far stretch to expect him to open up to her all of a sudden, but she would be lying if she said that hope hadn't crossed her heart.

"And if I want to talk to you?"

"You'd be bothering me." He answered flatly.

It went against her principles to bother people, especially her friends, but in a moment of hasty judgement, she decided to abandon those principles.

She pursed her lips, pressing on stubbornly. "Why won't you talk to me?"

"Because you're some random stranger spouting bullshit. I have nothing to say to you." Todoroki crossed his arms, eyes assessing her sceptically. "I don't get why you're trying so hard. Is it because of my family?"

His family was the last of topics she wanted to breach, especially in this world, but if it was the only way to keep the conversation going, she would be forced to-

A dismissive scoff broke that train of thought. "Don't bother. I don't know you or where you get your crazy ideas from, but do yourself a favour and don't bother coming back."

Momo huffed audibly. "You said I could do as I would. And I am here, doing just that."

"And I want this conversation to be over. In fact, it is over." He stood up before she could protest, breaking off her sentence with the loud screech of his metal chair being pushed across the floor.

He glanced back at her in the doorway, an unreadable expression on his face. "I mean it, don't bother with somebody like me."

* * *

[-]

* * *

"How do you, hypothetically, deal with an upset girl?" The _hypothetical_ was because Shouto had no intentions of explaining the whole Yaoyorozu situation, and because it was a stylistic device he had seen his brother use a few times.

A part of him felt that this was an appropriate time to use it.

Midoriya didn't quite seem to share that sentiment, staring right back at him with clear confusion written on his face. "You're the last person I expected to have girl problems."

"Hypothetical girl problems."

"..._right_." Midoriya nervously glanced to the side. "Uh, I guess it'd depend on this, em, _hypothetical_, girl of yours. Erm, hypothetically?"

Of course there was no easy answer. There never was an easy answer to any of his problems. "You know what, forget it."

"Sorry, I'm not exactly an expert on this either." Midoriya did seem apologetic. He really did. But apologies wouldn't give Yaoyorozu back the ability to fulfil her dreams. Apologies couldn't fix physical scars. Apologies couldn't undo the past.

Shouto nodded, swallowing the heavy lump in his throat. "It's fine, don't worry about it."

* * *

"Are you here to visit Miss Yaoyorozu?"

Shouto had spent the last ten minutes staring at the safety regulations plate in the hospital's main hall, only looking away from it at the nurse's question.

_Was_ he here to visit her? Technically, yes, but he had yet to actually do it. The main thing holding him back was the ever-burning question of what to say to her.

The nurse was still looking at him expectantly, awaiting an answer.

"I'll go up in a bit." He decided to answer. "Just need to… think about some stuff first."

* * *

He didn't visit her that day. Once the nurse had left the main hall, he had felt the sudden urge to walk out and leave.

It was an indescribable burst of anxiety and discomfort, something he rarely experienced, making it all the more unsettling.

It was as if some part of his soul and being was unable to face the girl in that hospital room.

And he could say with all sincerity that he hated this feeling.

* * *

_It wasn't like he could do anything to fix it._

The moment that thought crossed his mind, he froze up. His pencil fell from his fingers, rolling across the desk's wooden surface until it clattered against the ground.

"Hey, you okay? You dropped your pencil."

"I'm fine." He almost snapped in response, picking up the utensil from the floor, doing his best to get his rattled emotions back into check.

No, he wasn't going to push away the blame.

He was going to persevere, like _she_ would. He was going to keep going, like _she_ would.

_Just like Yaoyorozu would._

* * *

[-]

* * *

"You've really been out of it lately." Jirou remarked worriedly. her arms crossed in disapproval. "Is all the stress getting to you?"

"That's so weird though, you were never stressed out before." Hagakure chimed in, a floating eraser indicating her wild arm movements. "Not even when the physical exams rolled around. You were cool as ice back then."

"...ice?" Momo muttered, looking out the window. "What an odd comparison to make."

"You think? I don't find it all that weird." Ashido dragged a nearby chair to her table, plopping herself down on it once it was in place. "Oooh but you wanna hear something crazy?"

"Is it about your misadventures in reading maps again?" Jirou grinned innocently. "You sure seem to have a lot of those."

"First of all, _rude_. Second of all, no. This is actually about our class. Well, more like our year." She cleared her throat dramatically, preparing to tell an evidently long story. "Did you know there is a boy our age who's currently in the loony bin? He was supposed to attend UA, but a horrible incident prevented that."

Momo's attention peaked at that. Ashido wasn't talking about Todoroki, was she? But if she was…!

"So anyway, the story goes like this: The guy was a genius with an amazing quirk, able to use fire and and ice at the same time! And then-"

"Please, that's clearly made up." Jirou cut in pointedly. "That sounds like a walking contradiction, right, Yaomomo?"

"Huh? Oh, actually…" Momo wasn't entirely sure how to answer that. She knew it was true and real as can be, but Jirou doubting the story was not without fault either. "I think we should just let Ashido finish telling her story instead of nitpicking it."

"Yeah, Jirou, listen to Yaomomo. Now anyway, this guy had three siblings, all of them older than him, but since he was the youngest he was also the brattiest. One day, his older sister tried to reason with him, but the guy got so mad he activated his quirk and-"

Momo shut her eyes, as if it could drown out the words. No, she didn't want to hear it, not like this, not in this twisted story.

"-then his sister looked at her hands, only to find them set ablaze. I heard that she still can't use her right hand until this day. But anyway, the police and paramedics came and the guy was arrested, deemed insane and stuck in the loony bin."

One thing was for sure: Ashido's narrative skills were subpar. Momo cleared her throat, rasping out three words, "Mental rehabilitation facility."

"Huh? Mental what?"

"Please don't call it a loony bin. The correct term is mental reha-"

"Oooh, that sounds so smart. I'll be sure to use it as well!" Ashido seemed happy, excited and completely detached from the story she just told.

And she had the right to be. She didn't know Todoroki, or the hardships he's dealt with. All the things he had overcome. But… Momo knew.

"That's crazy though. Too crazy to be believable." Jirou commented, wagging a finger in disapproval. "You really need to stop believing these urban legends."

"It's true, I swear! The mental thingamajig isn't even that far from here."

"Coincidence.", the other girl shrugged, not buying into it, "a story like that would have made the news, don't you think?"

It did, actually, but Jirou was not one to spend too much time reading the news.

Hagakure was the next one to add her thoughts, her hunched posture giving away her demeanour. "It's still a bit disturbing, even if it's not true." Her tone was lower than usual, and the twists of fabric around her collar indicated her shaking her head. "Imagine if that crazy guy had been in our class."

"You really shouldn't say something like that about somebody you don't know." The words slipped off her tongue before she could stop herself. "We don't any of the real circumstances."

"Come on, Yaomomo, the dude burned his own sister's hand-"

"I'm sure there was a reason!" Her sudden outburst brought on a moment of silence among the girls, but her brain needed a few seconds to fully register what she had just done.

"Yaomomo? Are you okay?" Hagakure's voice was filled with worry and confusion but Momo could only blink rapidly, barely acknowledging their shocked faces.

And then, in a flash of pure brilliance and phenomenal problem-solving skills, she stood up abruptly and left the classroom with long, urgent strides.

* * *

Admittedly, snapping at her classmates and walking out angrily was not the ideal solution to the problem at hand. Admittedly, her arguments may have been a bit weak. Admittedly, she could have handled that a lot better.

She leaned against a nearby wall, letting out the long breath she had been holding in. There was a window next to her, leading into one of the bridges connecting the two towers. Had she walked all the way here? It was only a few more steps away, so she headed towards the glass bridge, coming to a stop in the centre of it.

She could see the other towers of UA's geometrical architecture from here, each one forming a symmetrical pillar to its counterpart. Every glass panel was polished to perfection, mirroring the sky in an infinite landscape of blue and white.

If only those glass panels could mirror her reality.

Her mind wandered back to Todoroki, both the one she knew and the one from this world. Maybe she should find a way to differentiate them? Hmmm… Obviously, the one she had come to know would be "Todoroki". Or perhaps "Todoroki 1"? Would that make the other one "Todoroki 2"? Or maybe…?

The Todoroki from this world was _not_ the one she knew… so… Not-Todoroki? Not-oroki? No-doroki?

No-to No-doroki.

"Noto Nodoroki." She repeated out loud, humming in thought at the sound of it. Yes, the boy in the mental correctional facility was "Nodoroki" henceforth.

Speaking of which…

She balled her hands into fists, looking back out the window in front of her. Nodoroki probably didn't know this stunning view. Nodoroki never had the chance to see it.

And even if Nodoroki didn't let her be friends with him, she'd do at least one thing - make sure he knew that he was not the monster the stories made him out to be.

* * *

[-]

* * *

"It's you, again." Yaoyorozu seemed less apprehensive and more confused. "Honestly speaking, I didn't expect you to come back after… last time."

"I apologise for that." Shouto was still standing at the door, trying to keep as much respectful distance from her as he could.

"If there's something you want me to do for you, and you actually think I'm capable of doing it, please just tell me. The last thing I need are people walking on eggshells around me." Her lips pursed slightly, a raspy whisper following shortly. "It's not like my life can get any worse, anyway."

The main problem was that he didn't know all the details himself, in a way it felt like handing in an incomplete report at the end of the year. Except this time there nobody was there to sigh and share her notes regardless, and there was no teacher who would begrudgingly look over his small mistakes.

Yaoyorozu gestured to the visitor's chair next to her bed. "Please, take a seat. I'd offer to make tea and dessert, but for obvious reasons, we'll have to skip out on those."

One foot in front of the other, he crossed the hospital room and complied with her words. He sat down stiffly, taking a deep breath before finally meeting her eyes.

"You're right. I do have something I'd like to ask you to do for me."

"And why me, specifically?"

"Because you're the only one I can ask."

"That's…" Yaoyorozu seemed uncomfortable. "I'm not sure… I mean, we don't even know each other… At least, i'm pretty sure we don't…"

"We don't." Saying it out loud cemented the fact once and for all. "We have never met before. You know nothing about me."

"W-well, then why-"

"Because you're amazing. You're… you're the smartest person I know. You can find the solution to this madness." At the end of the day, Shouto reverted to the one tactic he knew. Just… telling the truth, straightforwardly and without detours. "I know I'll sound like a madman, and you don't have to believe me, but-"

"Do you really think that?" His mindless rant was interrupted by a curious whisper. He stopped talking immediately, letting her speak freely.

Her eyes were trained on her hands, which had begun fiddling with her blanket. "You… you think I'm amazing?"

"Yes. Because you _are_."

"H-How would you even know that? Nothing about me has ever been made public, and we've never met, so how can you just say that?" She spluttered in disbelief. "How-"

"You don't know me, that's true. But I know you." Shouto spoke calmly. "And I _will_ fix this."

* * *

[-"I have a dream where I  
strangle you with both of my hands."-]


	4. Distorted Truths

**IV. Distorted Truths**

Yaoyorozu went silent after he finished his admittedly messy explanation. He didn't want to say too much, nor too little, but at the same time he needed her to know the truth.

"So you think this is a case of the Everett interpretation, correct?" She finally hummed after a few more minutes that he could have sworn made him age a few years on the inside.

"...not really." He replied reluctantly. "I really think this entire world is the creation of a quirk."

"In your head? Does that mean… that I'm not real? That my thoughts are not real? That my pain is not real?" Her lips pressed together into a bitter, thin line. "Just who do you think you are?"

"I don't know."

His answer seemed to have caught her off-guard. Her dark eyes never left him, the incredulence and confusion overflowing in them.

Seldomly had Shouto felt this stupid and useless."I don't know if this helps, but your thoughts… and your pain _do _matter… to me they do, at least."

"That's not the point here." She snapped back, infuriated. "You can't possibly so egocentric to think-" A gasp for air. "To think that _I _am a construct of _your _mind. And what does that even say about _you _-"

He wished he could unsee that she was on the verge of tears.

He wished he could undo all of this.

He wished for nothing but the best for her.

"How much do you _hate me _for your mind to put me in a situation like _this _?!" The dreaded question finally spilled from her lips. Her hands were gripping the edge of her blanket so hard her pale skin looked even paler, a slight tremble of anger shaking her frame.

It was difficult to explain the thoughts he had in that moment, or the way he felt. Maybe the issue was rather how he _didn't _feel.

This wasn't the real Yaoyorozu. Repeating that over and over like a mantra, he felt almost… nothing. This girl wasn't real. He wasn't actually hurting her feelings. She wasn't actually crying. None of it was real.

None of it was real.

None of it was-

The soft sound of her hiccup was too real. It was followed up by a stifled sniffle as the girl in front of him tried to contain her pride.

She looked just like the real Yaoyorozu.

"I don't hate you. I could never… hate you."

"Then_ why_-"

Nobody wanted to know that more than him.

* * *

[-]

* * *

"Will you listen to my story?"

"No."

"I'll tell you anyway." Momo stood her ground. "Todoroki, I know you quite well. I consider you a precious friend."

"The sentiment is one-sided."

"But when I'm talking about Todoroki, I don't mean _you_. I mean the real one."

"I don't know what you're going on about _now_, but I hate to tell you that I am very much real." He was not amused, his arms folded defensively in front of his torso. "If you would be so _kind _as to take your delusions elsewhere-"

"No, no, no, please hear me out." Her hands slammed against the transparent screen separating them, but her wasted attempt of reaching out garnered nothing more than a scowl.

"...If you can convince me within the next sentence, I'll consider listening to your delusions." He spoke reluctantly, almost uncomfortably, but it was a small light of the Todoroki she knew.

Todoroki wasn't heartless, or cold, he just wasn't very sociable, and that was just the way he was. She still admired him for so many of his qualities, and that was never going to change.

"Sometimes, I wished I could be more like you." She confessed, looking at No-doroki through her splayed fingers. She removed her hands, the traces of her handprints disappearing from the plexiglas shortly after, but he still didn't say anything in response.

And then he scoffed, bringing a hand to his lower face. He broke into a dry chuckle, turning his head to the side, letting his messy hair cover his expression as the chuckle grew into a cough and abruptly ended.

"But I'm a monster."

His words were muffled by the hand covering his mouth as his shoulders clenched visibly.

"No, you're not." Momo shook her head sadly. "The only monster here is me."

"What are you even talking about?"

"It's my fault that this happened to you."

"I find that even harder to believe than everything you've said so far, _combined_." He finally angled his head back, letting her see his face again. "Maybe you're the one who should be in this hellhole."

She could only laugh at that. "Maybe I am."

* * *

"Yaoyorozu? Are you here alone?"

Momo mindlessly ran the sponge across the blackboard one more time. She couldn't remember if she had done it already. The events from earlier still weighed on her heavily, making her wonder why she even bothered when she knew it was going to be a fruitless attempt.

Mr. Aizawa looked around the classroom and frowned. "You're already done with cleaning, why are you still here?"

"I… was just thinking about some things." She gnawed one her bottom lip. "Mr. Aizawa, can I ask you something?"

"...what is it?"

"Am I a bad person?" She put down the sponge and turned to face him. "Have I done something… terrible?"

"What are you talking about, Yaoyorozu? You're one of the best pupils I've ever had."

Something… something was off, _wrong _about that answer. There was a churning in her gut, telling her that something was amiss. "That's... not what I asked you about."

"Is this about the frequent visits you've been paying to the mental rehabilitation centre?" He leaned against the doorframe, indicating he was willing to stay and hear her out.

"Yes… Mr. Aizawa, Todoroki isn't a bad person." A pause. "But maybe… _I _am."

"I think the stress is just getting to you, Yaoyorozu. Maybe you should just go home and relax a bit."

"But this is important!"

He sighed. "You're starting to sound delusional."

Delusional. Delusions.

They both used those words. She couldn't blame them, either, but why did nobody… why did nobody… see things the way she did?

Maybe he was right. Maybe she was taking her delusions too far-

No, wait.

Those weren't delusions. They couldn't have been. All those months they spent together as classmates and friends, those weren't delusions.

They were crystal-clear memories.

"No, I'm not delusional. I know the truth, it's right here." She folded her hands over her chest. "Todoroki is a good person, and it's my fault that-"

Her teacher clapped once to interrupt her. "Yaoyorozu, this conversation isn't going anywhere, why don't you just let it go?"

...what? Let it go?

Her mind wandered back to the conversation at the rehabilitation centre. He had heard her out, but still dismissed her as crazy and left. That… that had hurt a bit, to say the least.

It had actually hurt a lot.

But that was exactly why she couldn't let it go. So why was he even suggesting such a thing…?

* * *

[-]

* * *

"Mr. Aizawa…?"

The older man sighed. "Do you want to talk about it?"

It was just the two of them in the hallway, two corners away from Yaoyorozu's room. Why was his teacher here at the hospital…?

"Thanks, but I'm good." He didn't want to talk, especially after his last talk with somebody ended with him being thrown out of a hospital room.

"Could have fooled me." Mr. Aizawa muttered. "Follow me, I know somewhere we can talk without interruptions."

Shouto was hesitant at first, but this was one of his teachers, so maybe… maybe he could give some insights? He pushed himself to his feet and followed the older man to the nearest staircase and… upwards. "Are we even allowed to be here?"

"Don't worry about that right now."

Well, except that _last time _he had disregarded rules like that, Mr. Aizawa had scolded him and his co-conspirators for thirty minutes straight and put them on trash duty for a month.

Still, he complied and soon they were standing on the hospital roof. The only other things present were the fluttering white sheets that had been hung out for drying, giving the whole scenery and sterile and cold atmosphere.

Not exactly ideal for a comforting conversation, even by his own standards.

"The nurses mentioned you've been coming here a lot."

"I…" What was he supposed to do? Give the same speech he had given Yaoyorozu just now? Clearly, that had gone _so well _.

"All of your visits have been to Miss Yaoyorozu, but it seems she's not too pleased by them."

"Well, that's…"

"Todoroki, your performance in school has been slipping lately. You can't take on another person's burdens when they don't even want you to."

"..." Why did this feel like… an intervention?

"I don't understand why you're putting so much effort into this, to be honest. What do you get out of this?"

That… that wasn't something his teacher would ever say. The knot in his stomach twisted uncomfortably as Shouto came to an unsettling conclusion.

"You're not Mr. Aizawa."

His "teacher" began clapping slowly. "Took you long enough to figure it out. Do you want a reward? A cookie, maybe?"

"If you're not my teacher, then who are you?" Shouto pressed on. Was this where he would finally get answers to this mess?!

The fake teacher lifted a hand slowly, but instead of attacking him as expected, he merely poked Shouto's forehead. "I'm a construct of your mind. You can consider me the tour guide in this little world."

"...what?"

The figure of Aizawa started blurring, morphing into something else. Slowly, it started looking more and more like… Shouto himself.

"If you don't like tour guides, you can always consider me the voice at the back of your head. The one that states all your selfish desires. The one that says the things you will never say out loud." A perfect replica of his voice, face and build stood across of him, an empty expression on its face.

"If you had listened to me, you wouldn't be here, you know?"

Shouto grimaced. "What do you mean?"

His replica laughed, but it sounded hollow. "It's hilarious how such a small change in context can change everything. You've been trying so hard to reject this world, to change it - because you thought I created it. Life can be pretty cruel, can't it?"

"Are you trying to tell me you didn't create it? That _I _didn't create this nightmare?"

...But if it wasn't birthed from his mind, then from whose?

"Wow, amazing, you figured it out." The other him smiled slightly. "I wonder what she would say, knowing that you hate her wish for you that much. Would she still look at you the same way? Would she still be your friend, I wonder?"

Shouto couldn't bring himself to answer. He wasn't sure what his self-proclaimed inner voice was implying, but it didn't sound like anything good.

"Speechless, huh? Well, you should try to use this period of time to start thinking about how to apologise to her. Or you can take this as a life lesson, and learn to listen to me more often."

"Who are you talking about? Who's 'she'?"

"The person who wished you nothing but the best, at the cost of her own well-being. Figure it out yourself, it's not that hard." His doppelgänger's smile grew into a grimace. "And then think back… think about what you did to her. If only you had listened to me…"

It wasn't a particularly hard riddle, if it even was a riddle to begin with. Shouto felt his gaze slip to the ground, his mind still trying to make sense of this predicament. But he knew for sure what his next question was going to be.

"And what would_ you _have done to save Yaoyorozu?"

* * *

[-]

* * *

"...I see." It wasn't the most eloquent answer, but it was the only thing Momo could say in a situation like this.

She had felt powerless before, but this time she was burdened with both the feeling and the added topping that it was her own misjudgement of the situation that had led to this. Her fists clenched so tightly that her nails dug into her skin. She could feel the pain, even if she now had confirmation that this world wasn't real.

It was a cruel quirk.

It made her into the cruel person. It twisted her words, her feelings, her sentiments into one big mess. The girl standing across from her crossed her arms.

"I know what you're thinking. The burning questions on your mind."

The classroom was empty, but the windows had been opened for some ventilation. A few rays of the setting sun still found their way into the room, bathing it in a warm glow.

All while Momo felt her heart grow colder and colder.

"Will Todoroki ever forgive you? Can you ever forgive him?" The other Momo spread her arms apart. "Can you ever be friends again? Can you ever…" She stopped there, a bitter expression marking her features.

"I…"

"Blaming yourself is easy, blaming somebody you care about is much harder." The other Momo - No-mo? - sighed, pulling down one of the upturned chairs and sitting down at the desk.

She looked so immaculate and perfect in the classroom environment, just like Momo always did.

"What am I supposed to do?" Momo asked, desperation leaking from her soul.

No-mo raised her hand like a diligent student. "The model student has the answer for everything, Momo Yaoyorozu." She stood up, walked to the blackboard and picked up a piece of chalk. It stopped right before the blackboard, never actually writing on it.

"Why are you doing this?" Momo spoke up again. It didn't make sense, why… why-?

The other her turned around and held out the chalk. "Why don't you write the answer on the blackboard?"

"But I don't know the answer."

"Write it down."

"I don't- I don't know it!"

"Write it." No-mo came closer, step by step, her expression locked into a perfect facade. The piece of chalk was placed into Momo's trembling palm.

* * *

[-]

* * *

The other Shouto clasped his hands. "Save her? Is that really what you want?"

"Of course it is."

"Are you sure you just don't want to play hero?" The copy pulled one of the white sheets from a hanger and draped it over his shoulders, imitating a… cape.

"Wha-" _what. _

"If you were to save her, you'd definitely show that you-"

"_Shut up_."

That was… that would mean… he was just like how his father used to be. That he… that he didn't actually care about her, that he only cared about the title-

"I'm not like that." He gritted out. "I… I only want…" He only wanted Yaoyorozu to be alright. To be safe.

That was a normal sentiment amongst friends, wasn't it?

"But are you _sure_?" Shouto#2 let go of the white sheet and let it fall the floor. That was insulting towards the hospital staff, even if they didn't actually exist.

"I'm sure. I know myself."

"So then, you also know that Ms. Yaoyorozu is going through something similar right now, correct?"

He had had a hunch. Yaoyorozu was a good person. Of course she would never prioritise herself over her friends. She always did the right thing.

And then he… he took what she had given him, and tried to get rid of it. No, those thoughts could wait until later. Right now, he had to find a way to break out of this quirk's clutches.

"She's very capable, I'm sure she's okay."

"Then you don't care that she put you into this hell?"

It was a double-edged sword. He couldn't deny all the things that had happened over the past weeks, all the frustration and anger he had felt, but now that he knew the truth, there was nobody to take that blame.

No, it was this quirk's fault. So why… why was it so hard to speak up?

"It's okay, Shouto, you can be true to yourself here." The other him leaned his head backwards, looking up at the blue sky. "It's just the two of us here. You can freely admit how much you hate this world. It's abhorrent and distasteful, wouldn't you agree?"

"..."

"I know what you're really thinking. I am you and you are me. Your silence means nothing here."

"No." Shouto looked at the ground, rifling through his thoughts. "If you really knew everything I'm thinking, then you would know that…" He stopped talking.

Something felt wrong here. More wrong than blaming this mess on Yaoyorozu.

"You don't need to think about it that hard." His doppelgänger held out a hand. "Just accept everything about me, and we can leave this place. We can even go and save Yaoyorozu."

"...can we really?" It seemed to easy, too simple. And, he didn't even…

"Of course, we can also leave her behind, that would increase our chances of getting out of this unharmed. The choice is yours, Shouto."

"No, why would I-"

"She just might leave you behind, too, you know? To save herself. Nobody would ever find out…" The hand was still outstretched, waiting for him to take it. "Besides, it wouldn't be the first time somebody turned on yo-"

No. These thoughts… they were wrong.

* * *

[-]

* * *

"I… I don't…kn...ow..." Her throat felt dry as her defenses grew weaker. Her chest hurt and… and had breathing always been this hard?

Was this… the end?

"Write it down. Now. Write it. You can do it. You're Momo Yaoyorozu, aren't you? You know everything. You're perfect. Write down the answer. The textbook answer. Do it."

What… what was she supposed to write?! What would happen if she didn't write anything?

Momo shut her eyes tightly, clamming her hands over her ears to drown the noise out. She didn't want to hear it anymore. She couldn't listen to her own voice when it wasn't her speaking. She-

"Momoooo, you know it."

_Were these really her true colours? _

"It's there, in your heart, in your soul."

_Was this her true nature? _

"Hidden away, so deep."

_Was this the real her? _

_How despicable. _

_How disgraceful. _

_How unsightly. _

Momo pulled her knees closer, huddling against the wall. She didn't want to be here, she wanted to leave, anything, anywhere but this-

_How could she ever call herself a hero?! _

"It's not your fault, it's all his fault."

_How… _

"You know, this would never have happened if he hadn't made that wish. If he hadn't cared about you."

_How… unfitting. _

"Why bother caring about somebody if all you're going to do is hurt them?"

_How… unlike her. _

"It would have been better if you never became friends in the first place, right?"

_No. Wait. Never. _

_Never. _

Never.

Ah.

"You're not me." She finally realised. "You're not… you're not real. I know myself and my selfish wishes, I know-" She scrambled to her feet, stepping around No-mo and walking backwards until her back met the blackboard.

No-mo's soulless eyes followed her every move, just observing silently, but never objecting.

"I… I know my heart, and my feelings!" Momo declared once more. "And _you're _not part of any of it. No matter what… no matter what…! I don't regret my choices! All my friends, I'd choose them over and over again. And I know…! I know they'd do the same!"

"How would you know? Maybe he hates you, and you're just _delusional _." No-mo's appearance began to change again, slipping away into an indistinguishable mass of black and grey. "Maybe your friendship is nothing more than a joke, maybe-"

"No." Momo cut her off. "You said it yourself, didn't you? This world… was because he… he…" Because he believed in her.

Even if she fought so desperately against the existence of this world, even if she trampled on his goodwill with her selfish reasonings, it didn't change the fact that this world came to be because he he cared about her in some way.

_What was she supposed to do? _

The answer was obvious.

She could feel it, this nightmare was going to come to an end soon. And there was only one final step.

Her hand moved across the blackboard, but before she could finish writing it, all windows suddenly shattered with an ear-piercing sound. The lights began flickering, and Momo's eyes darted across the chaos until they rested on the unknown entity.

It smiled bitterly. "Wrong answer."

* * *

[-]

* * *

There were two options here: take his hand, accepting all his claims, or refuse, going off into unknown territory.

Shouto briefly thought about how things would have gone a few years ago. He might have taken that outstretched hand.

Anything to get out of this nightmare.

However, something still felt off. As long as he couldn't put his finger on it, he wasn't going to make any decisions.

"What's wrong?" Shouto#2 asked, seemingly getting impatient. "What are you waiting for?"

"If you are me, and I am you, ... then why are so upset?"

"Upset? Me? Because you constantly ignore me! You never act on your impulses, always calculating-"

"No." Shouto always did whatever he deemed appropriate, even if others didn't see it that way. Yaoyorozu had even remarked that he was too straightforward at times.

So why did it feel like this person didn't know him at all, despite having the same face?

He stepped backwards, past the hanging racks, gradually creating distance between him and his so-called other self.

Maybe this was the way end this lucid dream. Nothing was real, even his fake self wasn't real. There was only one reality he knew, and that was where his school days started with a freshly-brewed cup of tea, prepared by Yaoyorozu.

A reality where he had so many, different friends that he trusted. He also had selfish thoughts at times, but he knew exactly what those were.

"You… aren't actually me, are you? I don't care who you are, but you're not me."

Whatever it was, he knew he wasn't going to accept that hand. His feet stepped onto the ledge, facing in the same direction as the girl's hospital room.

"Wait, what are you doing?! If you do that, you'll-!"

Shouto scoffed internally. What kind of choice had that been, abandoning or going to save Yaoyorozu? What a joke. She was perfectly capable of handling something like this by herself.

He was going to bring this to an end now, before the other person could do anything. He took the leap of faith, and gravity pulled him downwards, but something deep inside him knew everything was going to be okay.

This world wasn't real, after all.

This world was fake and fragile, shattering to pieces around him.

* * *

-[x-io-?-xx-]-

* * *

The blue sky was gone, instead replaced by vibrant sunset. The hospital building was a blur in front of him, but he saw it.

It lasted less than a second, yet the image was clear in Shouto's mind.

The girl's hospital room was gone, replaced by a classroom. All the windows were broken, but more importantly, he caught a glimpse of the blackboard, and in front of it, stood-

Yaoyorozu.

The one he knew. The real one.

And she had looked back, meeting his eyes.

And then, there was only darkness.

* * *

_[-"I created a monster,  
a hell within my head."-]_


	5. This Is Fine

**V. This Is Fine**

He blinked, his eyes adjusting to the sudden brightness. It was a familiar scene, one he had experienced not too long ago. What happened? Did he collapse?

The hospital ceiling was undoubtedly the one of Musutafu General Hospital, and the three people next to his bed were-

"Todoroki! You're awake!"

"Ah, I'll get the doctor!"

"Todoroki! How are you feeling?! Wait, let me get you some water!"

Midoriya was gesticulating wildly while Uraraka ran out of the room and Iida dashed to the sink. Why were his friends here? What…

"Do you remember anything?" Midoriya asked, leaning over him with a smidgen too much enthusiasm. "Do you have a headache? Does anything hurt?"

Shouto slowly shook his head, opening his mouth to respond in more detail, but his dry throat refused to comply. Had he gotten hit by Bakugou again? Was that it? How shameful…

"Give him a bit of space, Midoriya." A cup of water soon filled his vision, backed up by Iida. "Here, drink some water."

Shouto's arms and hands were weak and shaky, but he managed to hold on to the cup and quench his thirst. Once the drought in his esophagus died down, he turned back to his two classmates. "Thanks. What… what happened?"

"You and Yaoyorozu got caught up in a villian attack! You've been out for three days!" Tears welled up in the corners of his eyes, but he hastily brushed them away. "We're all just so glad that both of you are okay."

Yaoyorozu… Yaoyorozu… _Yaoyorozu _.

They knew who she was. She was okay.

Was he- Did he- Was this the real world? His real world?

"Wait..., a villain attack?"

"Mr. Aizawa knows more than we do, you should wait for him to get here. Ah, you'll probably get scolded for being so reckless, but you definitely did the right thing!" Midoriya cheered him on. "But you know how he is, you two might get stuck with trash and/or laundry duty again."

That… that was alright. It felt appropriate. It felt right.

He let out a long breath, relief washing through his stiff body. This world was the one he knew. The nightmare was finally over.

"What about Yaoyorozu? Is she alright?" Shouto inquired.

Midoriya's expression shifted. He was too easy to read, honestly. "She… she hasn't woken up yet, last we heard." He explained, averting his gaze. "But…! But the doctors said she's physically fine!"

Physically fine? It was something at least, but he couldn't rest easy until he knew for sure she had gotten out of there. All he had to go on was that brief flash of an image, when his nightmare world had broken apart.

He didn't even know if it had been real.

"Todoroki? What are you spacing out for?"

"It's… nothing, don't worry about it. I just have some stuff I want to ask Mr. Aizawa."

"Oh ,okay. I don't think he'll take all too long." Midoriya put on a reassuring smile, accompanied by a firm nod from Iida.

"I brought the doctor!" Uraraka stormed into the room. "How are you feeling, Todoroki?"

"I've felt better."

The doctor came in after her, two nurses flanking him. "Good afternoon, Mr. Todoroki. We'll just check your vitals and do some quick tests before anything else, so I'll have to ask your friends to leave for a short while."

* * *

"Before I start scolding you, I'll just say that I'm glad you two are safe." Mr. Aizawa unfolded his arms to pat Shouto on the shoulder. "Yaoyorozu woke up not too long ago, so I'll go give her the same speech after I'm done here with you."

"Is she alright?"

"I can imagine she's doing about as well as you are. You were both hit with the same quirk, after all." He sighed, sitting down in the empty chair next to the bed. "You were also the only two to be hit by the quirk, so I'll commend you for keeping the civillians safe.

Shouto swallowed the lump in his throat, thanking all higher entities for at least that much. "I'm relieved nobody else had to go through that."

"The heroes that arrived on the scene afterwards were able to apprehend the villain, but we weren't able to determine exactly what his quirk did, so you two were hospitalised until further notice." His teacher explained. "But you should be able to enlighten us on that aspect, now."

It was just a spark of hesitation, but it was enough to make Shouto rethink his next words. A sudden wave of… shame came across him. "I was stuck in a… bizarre dream." He muttered, for lack of better words.

"Hmm, that matches up with what the doctors speculated. They said your brain activity was too high for a comatose patient… What else can you tell me?"

"..." There were many things he could say, but he didn't want to. Still, he knew how important things like this were in their profession, so he tried to share the most important details without revealing too much. "You're placed in a manipulative environment, and you need to fulfill certain requirements to get out, but it differs from person to person…"

"I see… do you want to talk about?"

Shouto's mind flashed back to the last time he heard those words from that voice, making his shoulders stiffen involuntarily. "Not… not right now, sorry." He muttered, lowering his gaze.

It wasn't Mr. Aizawa's fault, but the feeling of unease still lingered.

* * *

"Your friend also woke up not too long ago." The nurse informed him cheerily. "You're stable enough to go outside, so do you want to go see her?"

The definitive answer was yes. Yes, he wanted to see her. There were so many things he wanted to tell her, but when it came to actually implementing that in real life, his confidence wavered. Just because he knew that her wish for him had been, didn't mean he knew what he had wished for her. And part of him didn't want to find out.

"...maybe later."

* * *

It was quite a bit later that he finally left the hospital room. His sister had come by in the meantime, being both a pleasant surprise and a good excuse to procrastinate his meeting with Yaoyorozu.

Now that she had left, he had decided to pull himself together and just do this. Nothing would come from him stalling endlessly, after all. He opened the door to the hospital's recreational backyard, the waft of fresh air inviting him to the outdoors.

Once his eyes caught sight of a familiar sweep of black hair, he steeled himself. It was Yaoyorozu, sitting on a bench near the the small inner lake, head tilted forwards in deep thought. With hesitant steps, he approached her, circling around the bench until he was standing right in front of her.

Aizawa didn't know much about the quirk affecting her, but maybe she had done the same as him and kept details about it to a minimum. In fact, the longer he assessed her demeanour, the more he was sure that she had gone through something similar.

And somehow, out of all the things he wanted to say, wanted to ask, wanted to tell her, the first words that left his mouth were, "How long?"

Her head snapped upwards, breaking her out of thought, leading into a short moment of her just looking into his eyes. He always thought he'd never be able to do it again, not after what happened, and yet here they were.

Her hands tightened around the shawl she had laid over lap, her answer coming out in an empty tone. "68 days." She pressed her lips together. "What about you?"

"A few months. I couldn't bring myself to start counting."

She nodded numbly, leaving silence to reign over them for a few seconds. "Ah, how rude of me. Won't you take a seat, Todoroki?" Her right hand moved away from the shawl, patting the free space next to her.

He hesitated, his mind flashing back to narrowed, dark eyes looking at him in distrust, contrasting Yaoyorozu's invitation. Slowly, he took up her offer, sitting down, but making sure to leave a respectable amount of distance between them.

He hadn't thought this out any further, to be honest. He knew he had to talk to her, but now that he was here, and his suspicions had been confirmed, he felt that all questions on the tip of his tongue were just… _stupid. _

It took a few moments of agonising silence before either one of them spoke up again. It was Yaoyorozu.

"Do you…" Her words faded into a low mumble beyond that. She turned her head away, clearing her throat before starting the question anew. "Do you want to… talk about it?"

Mr. Aizawa had asked the same question, but when she said it, he could feel his composure wavering. All the foundations began to fall apart, and like debris, everything spilled out when he opened his mouth.

"I'm sorry." Shouto looked forwards, past the lake into the disappearing city skyline. "It… I… I just kept thinking about myself. About _me _and _my _problems. I failed to… how do you say it? See the big picture?" He managed a sardonic chuckle. "I… failed you."

"How so?" She tilted her head downwards, staring right into her fiddling hands. "Am I not the one who failed you?"

The conversation died down once again. Putting himself back together, he took another deep breath. "Yaoyorozu, you did nothing wrong in any shape or form. You know that, right?"

"How can you say that? Compared to you, I…!" She slapped a hand in front of her mouth, averting her gaze after that outburst.

"Compared to me, what?" She didn't respond. He pondered over his next words, choosing to say them out loud no matter how bad they sounded in his head. "Yaoyorozu, I'm the one who screwed up. I'm the one who… doesn't deserve your magnanimity."

The seemed to get a reaction out if her. "My… magnanimity?" A smile made its way to her lips, but it looked more like a grimace than a sign of happiness. "As if. You don't have to lie for my sake, Todoroki. If any one of us is magnanimous, it's you."

He knew he had to ask the question. The one they were both avoiding. But… his throat constricted at the thought of finding out what kind of hell she had been put through because of him. At the thought of… having hurt her.

"You… you give me too much credit. You always have, since we first became classmates. Out of the two of us, you're the one who should be the hero." His words made sense in his mind, but out loud he just sounded like an idiot again. "Yaoyorozu. I'm the one who tried to resist the wish you had for me. I'm the one who was selfish. I'm the one who… betrayed you."

He couldn't look at her. Not after spilling that bit. But he decided that maybe it was just the time to sound like a blubbering idiot if It'd help convey his feelings. "Your wish for me… it's too much. That world… it should have been perfect. Everything should have been great. I should have been happy. But… you… you were…" He clenched his fists. "I couldn't live in a world like that if you weren't there with me."

Each second that passed after that felt stretched out into eternity, the burning desire to run away from his problems growing exponentially, to the point that he pushed himself off the bench, an apology on the tip of his tongue.

But something stopped him, forcing him to stay put. It was a hand, holding on to his sleeve with a firm grip. It was Yaoyorozu's hand.

"Todoroki." She said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. But it was enough to capture his full attention. "Todoroki, I trust you. I trust you. I believe you. I believe in you." She went on, closing her hand around his. "Won't you trust me as well?"

He could feel her unsteady heartbeat pulsing through her fingers, prompting him to finally turn to his head back to her, to look at her again. "...I do trust you. I've told you that before."

She shook her head. "But you're afraid. Afraid to talk to me."

"I'm talking to you now, am I not?"

"Look me in the eyes, Todoroki. Let's… let's talk about what we saw. In that world." She shifted towards him, gripping his hands with both of her own. "Please, trust me. I… If you didn't trust me, I…" She sucked in a sharp breath. "I couldn't live with that."

Afraid…? Afraid of what?

_Afraid of rejection. _

Of hurt eyes, looking at him in terror. Of somebody he cared about looking at him in fear. Like his mother's eyes, on _that _day so many years ago. Like _that _world's Yaoyorozu, looking at him with so much venom and anger.

"I…" If he looked up now, would he see those eyes?

"Todoroki. You… your wish for me… do you know what it was?"

No, but he was afraid to find out. What twisted corner of his mind did it spawn from? What kind of hell did he put her through? What…

His train of thought was interrupted by his hands being moved by an external force. It was Yaoyorozu, who had shifted the position of her fingers, allowing her to grip his hand more tightly. Almost… reassuringly.

"I was also afraid, when I found out what was going on. I couldn't possibly imagine what you had gone through. But… maybe… maybe… neither one of us knew what we were doing. Maybe both of our wishes were twisted in the worst way possible. Todoroki… the world I was in… it should have been you. It should have been you who had that position. It should have been you who was happy. Instead, you… you weren't there."

She paused briefly, taking a deep breath. "Your wish for me… was nothing but the best."

Her face popped up in his vision, even as he desperately tried not to look at her. But she was persistent, craning her head and leaning forward until their eyes met. "Todoroki."

For a few seconds, he forgot what words even were, and how to use them. In all the time his brain needed to remember how to be a comprehensible human being. she just kept looking at him. With those eyes.

And they weren't angry. They weren't afraid. They weren't terrified.

But… they were… "Sad... Why do you look so sad?" His own voice sounded foreign to his own ears, the question barely coming out intact.

"Because I didn't want it." She answered seriously, her eyes never wavering. "If having the world means giving up somebody I care about, then I don't want it."

* * *

Momo made sure to stand her ground, doing anything to make sure the Todoroki would understand this. From what he had said earlier, she was beginning to understand the entire situation, and she knew if she didn't bridge this gap now, she might never be able to fix it again.

She could not allow herself to hesitate this time. Not like all those days she had spent hesitating. Those 68 days that had passed in her head, days she spent wallowing in self-pity and self-deprecation.

No, not this time.

"Shouto Todoroki." She said his name one more time for good measure. "I… I wished you the best as well, didn't I? I sent you to a world where you had everything, is that not so? Because I want to see you succeed, just like… you did for me."

"You… No, not you… That girl… she wasn't you. She…" He looked away once again, jaw clenched visibly.

"She didn't trust you?"

"She didn't."

"But I do. I trust you. With my life."

"You shouldn't."

"But I do. You trust me, too, don't you? The real you."

She could sense him glancing back at her, even with his face directed towards the ground on his other side. "..." His jaw moved, but no words came out.

"Todor-"

"That girl… she'll never be a hero." He interrupted her suddenly. "She lost her dream. She may not have been real, but I… if that ever happened in real life… I'd never forgive myself."

"And that boy will also never be a hero. He also lost his dream. But I want you to trust me that I will make sure that never happens. To either one of us. To any of our friends. We'll strive to be heroes together, remember?"

At last, he turned his head back. "That's a bold claim."

"Plus Ultra. Do you trust me?"

The hardness in his eyes eased, giving leeway for the emotions hidden underneath it. She felt him reciprocate the firm hold on her hands, a hint of a smile forming on his face. "With my life."

Admittedly, that line may have been a bit overdramatic, but she could only feel the warmth bubbling within her at that moment. A serene kind of happiness that meant more than a world in which everything was perfect.

A perfect world didn't need heroes like them, after all.

* * *

_[-"I'm not after fame and fortune,  
I'm after you."-]_

* * *

**AN: well this fever dream is finally over thank you for reading xD**


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